Tuesday, March 8, 2011
I....had an experience this morning. I have been wrong my whole life............
It was a normal morning. I started the day with my normal routine (I got up, blasphemed every god supposedly in existence, then showered). Got out of the shower, and before I could put my towel around my manly self, the bathroom light flickered and I heard this sound that I could not quite place. Anyways, I collected myself (I was shaken) and got dried off, dressed, etc. Headed downstairs, put some bread in the toaster, threw my ingredients into the blender for my protein shake, and that's when it happened:
I looked down into the tub of protein powder, and the scoop that resides in it was not in the same position I had left it. Normally I have it upside down, but somehow it was half buried in the powder, with the handle pointing up to the ceiling. I looked up, and immediately knew this was a sign. So, I head over to the tv, unblock the religious channel, and tune in, understanding that the first religion I see represented would be the one whose god was calling to me.
And so, there, on the tv, after the commercial break, I see the handsome face of an evangelical christian spreading the word of g-d and asking for donations in HIS name, and for once, I have no sarcastic thoughts. I utter not a sound. No laughter or witticism passes my lips on this day.
It was beautiful.
I was in awe. I had finally seen what they have been seeing all these years and I tell you I repented on the spot. I felt the love of the Lord today and now I know the joy of letting go and letting your heart guide you through life on the way to the eternal paradise that awaits us all (if we follow the rules. HIS rules).
And so, from this day forward, I will be a christian, and my heart will be my guide.
All thanks to the power of protein. I guess protein does make you strong........
(Come on, tell me you didn't know this was coming.)