Is All Offense Equal?

If one person is offended by something another person does and asks them to stop doing it but the second person says they are offended by the first person's attempt to control them is the second person's offense as legitimate as the first person's?

I have been thinking about this intermittently for over a year as it happened to me at work with a former coworker- she interrupted a conversation I was having to ask that I stop swearing (she was of the Muslim faith and very conservative) as it offended her. I was mixed on this as on the one hand it's not a big deal to try and reign it in a bit if it makes her more comfortable but on the other hand now I have someone trying to control my language- even when I am talking to someone else.

I ruminated on this for a while and then I asked her "If my swearing offends you it is right for me to stop it, yes?" She agreed and then I asked her "Okay now say I am offended at your attempt to control my speech- should you now respect my offense and stop trying to control what I say?" Her answer, which pops into my mind every once in a while and gets me thinking about this again was.....*interesting.* She simply said "No, it's not the same thing."

Hmmmm......

So I ask you: Is all offense equal or are there levels of offense? A secondary question I guess would be is being offended the fault of a third party or a function of your own psychology and therefore cannot be pinned on someone else?

Geert Wilders: on trial for telling the truth

Two Years in Jail for "Offending People?"

This blog, by Douglas Murra, a bestselling author and award-winning journalist based in London, describes an ongoing trial in Amsterdam, which consists of a popular politican being put on trial for.......are you ready for this?

Offending Muslims.

Yes, freedom of speech is on trial in Amsertdam.

A small excerpt:

The Dutch courts charge that Wilders ‘on multiple occasions, at least once, (each time) in public, orally, in writing or through images, intentionally offended a group of people, i.e. Muslims, based on their religion’.


I’m sorry? Whoa there, just a minute. The man’s on trial because he ‘offended a group of people’? I get offended by all sorts of people. I get offended by very fat people. I get offended by very thick people. I get offended by very sensitive people. I get offended by the crazy car-crash of vowels in Dutch verbs. But I don’t try to press charges.

Yet, crazily, this is exactly what is going on now in a Dutch courtroom. If found guilty of this Alice-in-Wonderland accusation of ‘offending a group of people’, Wilders faces up to two years in prison.


If anyone doubts the surreal nature of the proceedings now going on they should simply look through the summons which is available in an English translation here. It shows that Wilders is on trial for his film Fitna. And for various things he has said in articles and interviews in the Dutch press.

This video talks about the issue: