Gaming Conventions That Need to Go! Pt. 4

1) Invisible barriers. They just don't make any sense. Either design a real barrier, or get/design a better engine that isn't so restrictive.

2) Key cards. These should have went out 20 years ago.

3) Cliffhanger endings. These are evil. Especially in the cases where a sequel never even materializes. I think you should always tie up your story as best you could. Treat each game like a microchosm of the overall story.

4) Kidnapped girlfriends. Some of the best games ever made have this as a plot outline, but still, let it go already. Why not start kidnapping some grandfathers already?

5) Instruction Manuals in 2009......redundant much? Waste of resources? Almost every game now explains the story and controls/how to play in game.

6) Mashing a button to open a door. THIS IS NOT FUN. THIS IS NOT IMMERSIVE. It's stupid, boring, repetitive and ruins the pacing of the game. I blame God of War for this crap (that damn game popularized QTE's in general, damn (still awesome) game).

7) Scantily clad women. I'm sorry, but um....why are people turned on by digital characters that don't even look remotely realistic enough to pass for real people?

The End?

Well, readers, I am sad to say that this may very well be the last Gaming Conventions that must Die! Blog. So, barring any unforeseen flashes of genius, I believe this may very well be it. Don't cry. I'll try not to.

Thanks (yet again) for reading.

Gaming Conventions That Need to Go! Pt. 3

1) Hey, you made it!! It's been 12 hours, you finally get to fight the boss that has been eluding and tormenting you the whole time (likely after killing or kidnapping someone close to you). This should be AWESOME! You have all those fancy skills now..............oh wait. No no no. The boss is impervious to all but one of your attacks. Figure out which one it is and then spam it for 2 minutes to win. GOOD LUCK!

2) That mysterious voice that tells you where to go/what to do.......I don't see a headset or earpiece anywhere on my character....so how the hell am I hearing you exactly?

3) Unskippable dialogue. Man, when a game has bad dialogue, or you have already played through it and just want to get to the game, not being able to skip lengthy dialogue sucks, especailly if it's text and it displays slowly. Really bad when you die and reolad and have to sit through it all again.

4) Unskippable cutscenes. Same concept as unskippable dialogue. They suck when you just don't care about the story, or if you have seen it already and just want to get to the game. This, just like with the unskippable dialogue, is especially bad when you die and relad and have to sit through it all again.

5) AI temmates in shooters being able to do things I cannot; this even happens when I am supposed to be the leader of the sqaud and they are my subordinates. An example of what I mean is in some games , the AI can take cover, but the player cannot. This makes no sense, unless there's an explanation for it in the story....which there never is.

6) Escort missions. Enough said.

7) Timed missions. See above.

The End

Thanks for reading part 3 of this series.

Nostalgia: 80's and 90's Fads

Remember these 80's/90's fads? Oh, the nostalgia!

Beanie Babies

Hackey Sacks/Footbags

Helicopter Hats and Denim Shorts on Guys

Jolt Cola

Mullets!

Parachute Pants (remember the sound these made when you walked?)

Payphones

Rolled Up Jeans

Pogo Disc Ball....Things

POGS!!

Pop Rocks (remember the myth about exploding stomachs?)

Pump Up Sneakers

The Jheri Curl!

Warheads

Gaming Conventions That Need to Go! Pt. 2

1) Ammo pickups.........who's leaving all this ammo behind? Hell, Robocop for xbox (HORRIBLE GAME) had ammo pickups....yet his gun is the only one of its kind in existence!

2) Nonsensical Puzzles: Hey, I'm a diabolical bad guy, and I'm being chased by the hero......what to do, what to do.....OH, I KNOW!!!! I'll hide this key to the door in a magical box that can only be opened when you put this picture that's been broken into 9 pieces back together. That'll slow him down! Of course, I could just hide/destroy the key...

Gaming Conventions That Need to Go! Pt. 1

This is the first of a series I will be doing in which I look at gaming trends/conventions/just little things in games that either don't make sense, are annoying, outdated, need to be done away with, or all of the above. Not all are big deals, some are very minor, so don't take this too seriously.

1) Dying in games. I was playing Dead Space, and what should have been a terrible moment (literally being ripped apart by a very fierce enemy) didn't really matter because I knew I'd be back 10 seconds later as though it didn't happen. I'm not sure what could take the place of deaths in games, but they just don't make any sense. You die dozens of times during the course of some games.....and it never really matters. Except in one game I can think of: Steel Battalion. In this game, if you die, your SAVE GAME GETS ERASED.

2) Pressing start at the title screen. Um, why? Flash the title then go to the menu or have the title imposed on the menu screen. Not a big deal just makes me chuckle.Especially when some games literally force you to press the START button. The A button won't even work.

3) QTE's. Hey, you just worked hard to get to this awesome looking boss. You could use the skills you have learned to take it out in some epic fashion......OOORRRR you could play Simon Says and see you kick it's ass out of the corner of your eye while you pay attention to the button prompts.

4) Exploding barrels everywhere. Hey guys, we're hding out here where the good guys are coming with guns and grenades. We should stock this place with explosive barrels, and stand near them!

DUR, OKAY!

And finally:

5) Locked doors. Let's see, I have a chainsaw, grenades, a rocket launcher, and an assault rifle....but I think I'll find the long way around........WHY NOT BLOW THE DAMN DOOR DOWN!

Alright, that's it for now. Stay tuned for more to come.