Monday, March 19, 2012

R.I.P. Ninja Gaiden 1988-2012

Am I living in a fucking nightmare? I have been pinching myself so hard I have airplane sized welts all over my body, so I suppose that I am in fact awake, which means I really am witnessing the destruction of the Ninja Gaiden series. IGN has just weighed in with a hilariously bad 3/10 review (yes, 3/10), player feedback on the forums has been mostly bad to downright terrible, and frankly, I fucking toldyouso.

IGN Gives Ninja Gaiden 3 a Fucking 3/10!!!

http://xbox360.ign.com/articles/122/1221032p1.html

IGN scores Ninja Gaiden 3 a 3/10. What a fucking disaster. Hayashi and co. have RUINED the greatest series of action games on the planet.

Ugh.

I'll be ranting about the game in detail at a later date.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

The Witcher 2 Enhanced Edition Trailer is GREAT

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Ninja Gaiden 3 News: Scythe and Falcon's Talons (Claws) Are Free DLC

http://andriasang.com/con0a4/ninja_gaiden_3_dlc/

Famitsu is reporting that Tecmo Koei will be releasing the Eclipse Scythe and the Falcon's Talons as free DLC. No word of when or how they will be utilized in the game, but my money is on Day 1, and multiplayer/Ninja Trials only.

Oh, and you bet your ass that this is their way of appeasing us because they plan on charging us for the rest of them and they know we are expecting it and will NOT be happy about it.

If Online Dating Profiles Were Honest

If online dating profiles were totally accurate and 100% honest, this is what they would sound like:

Male:

Hi, my name is John. I'm a 30 year old divorced male. I'm skinny-fat and haven't had a tan since my Honeymoon. Have barely had sex since then as well, and I am afraid that I have forgotten how it works, but I digress. I have lost 15% of my hair in the last year and this terrifies me. On top of that, as this hair disappears, other hairs show up in really strange places. I sometimes go three or four days without showering. I am strangely fascinated by the smell of my own farts. I am self deprecating, but only as a preemptive defense mechanism.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Sex Before Marriage Rant

I wanted to rant about premarital sex and religion, and I decided to do it in the form of a response to a fictional character who would represent the real fears of many real people. Hence, witness my rant in the form of a response to Sam, a ficticious 18 year old who is concerned about the fact that he and his girlfriend of four years just had sexual intercource for the first time, despite the fact that they were planning on waiting for marriage. Sam feels dirty and ashamed of his 'sin,' as he calls it, and he is terrified of the possible consequences awaiting him in the afterlife.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Facebook Page!

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